Forum.RttP{George Carlin's take on the hurricane.... funny shit.}

"Been sitting here with my ass in a wad, wanting to speak out
about the bullshit going on in New Orleans. For the people of New Orleans...

First we would like to say, Sorry for your loss. With that
said, Let's go through a few hurricane rules: (Unlike an earthquake, we know it's coming.)

#1. A mandatory evacuation means just that...Get the hell out. Don't blame the Government after they tell you to go. If they hadn't said anything, I can see the argument. They said get out, if you didn't, it's your fault, not theirs. (We don't want to hear it, even if you don't have a car, you can get out. You have feet; you have a thumb; and there were buses that came and no one rode out - Duh! Doesn't take a brain surgeon to figure this one out.)

#2. If there is an emergency and you plan not to evacuate, stock up on water and non-perishables (and rubber rafts). If you didn't do this, it's not the Government's fault you're starving and wet.

#2a. If you run out of food and water, find a store that has
some. (Remember, shoes, TV's, DVD's and CD's are not edible. Leave them alone.)

#2b. If the local store has been looted of food or water, leave
your neighbor's TV and stereo alone. (See #2a) They worked hard to get their stuff. Just because they were smart enough to leave during a mandatory evacuation, doesn't give you the right to take their stuff...it's theirs, not yours.

#2c. If you're one of those negligent humans who subjected their children to this disaster by staying in New Orleans, putting what you wanted to do before their safety, then you need to be prosecuted for endangering their lives. If you are a person who stole non-edible items in front of your children then you should be prosecuted for contributing to the delinquency of minors. And if your child was hurt, became ill due to the conditions or died during this disaster, then you should be executed.

#3. If someone comes in to help you, don't shoot at them and
then complain no one is helping you. I'm not getting shot to help
save some dumbass who didn't leave when told to do so.

#4. If you are in your house that is completely under water,
your belongings are probably too far gone for anyone to want them, so that reason for staying put doesn't hold much water (pardon the pun). If someone does want them, let them have them and hopefully they'll die in the filth. Just leave! (It's New Orleans, for Christ's sake - find a voodoo warrior and put a curse on them.)

#5. My tax money should not pay to rebuild a 2 million dollar
house, a sports stadium or a floating casino. Also, my tax money
shouldn't go to rebuild a city that is under sea level. You wouldn't
build your house on quicksand would you? You want to live below sea-level, do your country some good and join the Navy.

#6. Regardless of what the Poverty Pimps Jessie Jackson and Al Sharpton want you to believe, The US Government didn't create the Hurricane as a way to eradicate the black people of New Orleans; (Neither did Russia as a way to destroy America). The US Government didn't cause global warming that caused the hurricane (We've been coming out of an ice age for over a million years).

#7. The government isn't responsible for giving you anything.
This is the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave, but you gotta work for what you want. McDonalds and Wal-Mart are always hiring, get a damn job and stop sponging off the people who are actually working for a living. President Kennedy said it best..."Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country."

#8. This situation was the fault of your state's power-hungry
Governor (dumb bitch didn't want to admit she wasn't in control and hand things over to FEMA and National Guard) and your proud, but innately ignorant, minority Mayor. The year after he was elected Nagy took all the $4.5 Million in emergency funds allocated to assist New Orleans' residents, for just this type disaster, and used them to teach minority kids to play sports. So if you're up to your waist in muck and starving, ask a kid with a basketball for some assistance because he got your funds.

Thank you for allowing me to rant."