Theres this little old lady who works in my office thats older than dirt and should be long retired but shes never taken a raise the whole time she's worked for this company so they cant make her retire. She drags her half dead carcass around all day long making sure to stop and talk to EVERYONE about absolutely nothing. She wears the same blue wig everyday, has a road map on both her legs and a hunchback. All this wouldnt bother me so much if she didn't SMELL SO FUCKING BAD!!!!!!!!! HOLY SHIT!!! This is beyond "old people smell"!!! Its not moth balls, its not potporie...I'm not sure if its premature rotting flesh but goddamn!! And it never hits you right away. Its always about a minute after shes been there and it lingers for another 10 minutes afterwards. Its one of those smells that you can taste so it doesnt matter if you just breathe through your mouth; it still suffocates you regardless. I keep a fan at my desk. Not because its hot though. I use it to air the fucking place out after shes gone and sometimes that doesnt even work. Like right now! Which is why I'm sharing this information with everyone. She just spent a half hour outside my office yuckin it up with some corporate hog about stupid fucking corporate bullshit that nobody thinks is funny yet everyone feels obligated to laugh at.....except me. Im thinking about setting up a trip wire for her but i think id get caught. Any ideas?

go to bath and body works and pick out your favorite scent and buy her a bottle of the body spray..best $10 you'll spend at work

she'll get the hint

Christraper, wtf are you doing tonight?

armageddonday said:


nothing why?

When Christ Traper says you smell, then you do smell.

I often discuss people's smells at work.. usually it the Mr.Burns old person smell.. eh...

hes going to as220.

the_reverend said:

you tryin to say im a smelly guy or something? i shower!

CHRIST RAPER

what about my comment??

Sounds like a bad case of BO/rotting pussy smell.Maybe she needs to douche,LMAO!!!

succubus said:

Its a good idea but i have a rather large fan and if that wont do any good then im not so sure the lotion will either. On top of that i make it quite obvious at work that i have no desire to speak with anyone so if i just randomly walk up to this lady and give her a bottle of smelly lotion it probably wouldnt go over too well.

old people make me sooooo mad
just looking at them i get the rage flowing through my system

JoeDavolla said:

hah. you gotta love it when that smell can overpower an entire person.

maybe she has some disease or is taking medication that makes her smelly. i dunno. the only thing that really bothers me about old people is at work when old men ask something, they get really close and usually have fucking dog breath. yick.

christraper said:


ok but think of it this way..you give her that and she won't come up to you and talk EVER

or maybe she'll be so thankful for the gift that she'll talk to you more...

succubus said:

by golly youre right!

Whats going on tonight Anne?

i know that smell too. old people dont actually shower, and im serious, they shower like once a month and shit. it must suck to be old, if i ever end up that old please kill me. i would hate to be so withered that i cant even take care of myself!

bummer, but yeah they do all smell funny

and thats why old ladies wear so much perfume

We have a show at AS220 with Kylesa, Fourhorse, Straight To Helll, Raising Kubrick starts at 9pm...

armageddonday said:

I am cashless and without transportation. Otherwise Id totally be there.

Old people are dead inside and rotting slowly.