I had one goddamn chicken quesadilla from Taco Bell and I've felt its wrath 6 times thusfar. To top it off, I am out of toilet paper. I'm afraid to go buy more because I may end up shitting in my car. This is a sad day.

You're not even a man.

you were warned.

What I don't get is the fact that I've eaten a quesadilla, a regular taco, a grande soft taco, a large Mountain Dew Baja Blast (which is way too delicious to be on this earth) followed by some sort of tasty dessert treat in the past and never been bothered. I was sabotaged either by Taco Bell or my own body telling me not to eat shitty food since I've been on my way to being healthy again. At least I've lost about 5 pounds today, hahaha.

it seems like in summer, stools are just looser. I have the same problem.

i like taco bell, but i instantly get heartburn when i eat it now.

my body cut me off.

The sad thing is...I really want a fucking chicken quesadilla now, haha. All this anal expulsion is making me hungry considering the fact that there is NOTHING left inside of me.

i want 4 chicken quesadillas

im a fan of the double decker taco supreme

I'll see that 4 chicken quesadillas and raise you 1 more, Spalding.

I've stayed away from fast food (minus pizza) for months now and I fear that my innards will explode if I dare tempt fate.

I just killed 2 egg/cheese sandwiches and 3 sausage links, and I want to plop a quesadilla or two right down on top of that shit after reading this. And then I can leave for the BBQ. Ah, summer...

A few years ago I quit fast food and soda from the beginning of November though the 2nd week of February and I lost 25 pounds with no regular exercise. I need to have the same will-power now that I did back then and I'd be all set. All this taco talk is getting me reaaaalllly fucking hungry now. I hate life.

whenever i talk to mark, i want pizza.

thats just a default emotional responce.

mmm, I quit soda too. I'm a skinny bastard though so pretty much nothing ever changes for me. My feeling of healthiness relies solely on stress level at this point.

but for the record, I too have been shitting furious blasts of anal wreckage lately.

Haha, pizza is definitely a natural emotion, Keith.

My mother is registered dietitian and has a Master's Degree in health education so she's the perfect source for health information. According to her, stress is one of the leading causes of unhealthy behavior in the US. Most of the health education that she advocates here in the US would be complete bullshit in other countries (i.e. Italy, which is full of smog and everyone smokes like a chimney, yet they all stay stress-free, no one in the country is fat, and they all age gracefully).

So, Brian, it is good that you're taking stress levels into consideration.

MarkFuckingRichards said:


use the cardboard roll. just unpeel it and you should have just enough for one "sitting." It's a bit abrasive, but my asshole's been through much worse abuse...

condolences, mr. fucking. that's terrible-awful. put yourself on a red-jello diet and you should at least be back to solid in two days.

Haha, I've been using paper towels. It is a careful art, because using too much or balling it up in a certain way clogs the toilet. I'm at a 100% efficiency rate at this point.

Fuck red-jello, I'm going back to Taco Bell because I hate myself too much, haha.

i can see it now, mark sobing over a taco and he munches away...

It's almost tragic. I'm pretty sure I'm not going to have Taco Bell again though, haha. I don't want to put myself or my toilet through this anymore.

maybe its god telling you not to eat taco bell since it is the day of god and all?

How many Mark Richards does it take to change a light bulb?

3.

One to change the bulb, and the other two to stand and throw feces at each other. Hehehehehehehehehe.

GoatOfCatalyst said:

wrong quote!(sorry goat...im a bit buzzed!)

DomesticTerror said:

(sorry goat..)! i mean to comment on this...
"Yes domestic terror has been anally raped by catch a rising star!"

Luckily for my asshole I decided to take the safe route and eat a turkey sammich. It was delicious, and I feel 10K x better after lucky number 7 happened a few hours ago.

murph nli said:

Mark isn't black.

Stop trying to keep me down, whitey.

I ate taco shit 2 weeks ago, and I had such bad gas for 2 days. And had to shit 30 minutes after eating.

havent you people learned anything yet?! this shit's so awful to your body.


... now, does anybody got a dollar so i can go get a damn taco?

Haha, exactly.

I had some taco bell after summa slawtur last night. i got da shitz too.

oh man - what did that poor dog do to that cantankerous old coot?

This is why if I want mexican food, I try to look for the real deal.
And then I call ICE.

I bought 2 crunch wrap supremes last night and a bean and potato burrito. the burrito is still in may car... do I dare eat it on the ride home tonight? probably.

the Mexican cop Garcia on Reno 911 was the voice of the dog

Rev, you are insane if you eat that burrito...but I will have much more respect for you anyway.

Just hit my 9th trip the toilet, and I believe number 10 will arrive before I go to sleep. This sucks!

I've done it plenty of time. btw, what is the shelf life of sour cream in a hot car?

I still say Mexico Lindo has some of the best mexican food in the valley area, but taco bell is good for a quick fix.

but both places still do give you the shits.

xanonymousx said:

markfuckingrichards gives me the shits.

I didn't get the shits from the TB

I got food poisoning from a questionable, yellowish Meximelt when I was 14. Took five years for me to eat Taco Bell again.

Mark was crying into his Taco fearing when he goes to see Erika as he knows he can't live without Taco Bell no matter how much it still hurts him and the people who care about him. He doesn't need a repeat of a past incident that caused a riff in their relationship.

YOU GUYS ARE NAZIS MAN! YOU GUYS ARE FREAKIN' NAZIS!!!

oh god, I just gave in and bought some TB.

so good and yet so bad, so very bad. The bad that keeps on giving.

i'm sorry but "goddamn" and "taco bell" can only be used in the same sentence if its "taco bell is so goddamn good".

I stared the demon right in its delicious face today and ate a chicken quesadilla. It has only made me poop once so far, and it was normal. I am the victor. I have slain el diablo de taco.

crunch wrap supreme with fire sauce is what you want to get

Crunchwrap Supreme is a tasty dish, but Taco Bell would seriously be useless to me if they didn't have chipotle sauce (featured in the chicken quesadilla of course).

well, looks like Taco Bell is on the menu tonight. i need a 1/2 lb beef and potato burrito.

Ever have Taco Bell twice in one day? That's a fucking recipe for suicide.

i dont think i could willingly put my digestive system through such torture. how about a Taco Bell eating contest? i witnessed one of my friends eat an unreasonable amount of TB in one sitting, an amount that would cause Usagi Yojimbo or whatever that ultimate eaters name is to keel over and die. i have been trying to get my friend to partake in one, but no one will oppose him.

you're over 15. why are you even going near a taco bell?

blasphemy!

Yeti, as tantalizing as that challenge is, I don't think I could live with myself, nor could my toilet live with me, after that event.

Hooker, Taco Bell is a MAN's restaurant. Get with the times. Ever since you got a mullet, you've changed man...

You should know better not to eat that mana.

I can't help it! I yearn for latin heat...especially since my girlfriend is Guatemalan.

MarkFuckingRichards said:

PIKER

http://www.tacocabana.com/

Home of the Original Taco Shytz

MarkFuckingRichards said:

Taco Bell is to Latin Heat what Ateryu is to Hardcore.