From: Mrs. Serena Jones

PLEASE ENDEAVOUR TO USED IT FOR THE CHILDREN OF GOD.

I am the above named person from Kuwait. I am married
to Dr.Harry Jones who worked with Kuwait embassy in
Ivory Coast for nine years before he died in the year
2000.We were married for eleven years without a child.
He died after a brief illness that lasted for only
four days. Before his death we were both born again
Christians.Since his death I decided not to re-marry
or get a child outside my matrimonial home which the
Bible is against.When my late husband was alive he
deposited the sum of 10Million Dollars (Ten Million
United State Dollars) with one finance/security company in
Amsterderm Holland. Presently, this money is still
with the Security Company. Recently, my Doctor told me
that I would not last for the next three months due to
cancer problem. Though what disturbs me most is my stroke
sickness. Having known my condition I decided to donate this
fund to church or better still a christian individual that will
utilize this money the way I am going to instruct here
in. I want a church that will use this funds to fund churches,
orphanages and widows propagating the word of God and to ensure that the
house of God is maintained. The Bible made us to
understand that Blessed is the hand that giveth.
I took this decision because I don't have any child
that will inherit this money and my husband relatives
are not Christians and I don't want my husband's hard
earned money to be misused by unbelievers. I don't want
a situation where this money will be used in an
ungodly manner.
Hence the reason for taking this bold decision. I am
not afraid of death hence I know where I am going. I
know that I am going to be in the bosom of the Lord.
Exodus 14 VS 14 says that the lord will fight my case
and I shall hold my peace. I don't need any telephone
communication in this regard because of my health because
of the presence of my husband's relatives around me always. I don't want
them to know about this development.
With God all things are possible. As soon as I
receive your reply I shall give you the contact of the
Finance/Security Company in Amsterderm Holland. I will
also issue you a letter of authority that will prove
you as the original- beneficiary of this funds. I want
you and the church to always pray for me because the
lord is my shephard. My happiness is that I lived a life of a worthy
Christian. Whoever that wants to serve the Lord must
serve him in spirit and truth. Please always be
prayerful all through your life. Any delay in your
reply will give me room in sourcing for a church or
christian individual for this
same purpose. Please assure me that you will act
accordingly as I stated herein. Hoping to hearing
from you.

N.B-PLEASE I WILL ADVICE YOU TO GIVE THE
LAWYER IN CHARGE A CALL IN HOLLAND IMMEDIATELY, HE
DOES EVERYTHING ON MY BEHALF AND HE'S VERY
UNDERSTANDING AND I BELIEVE HE WILL LEAD YOU TO YOUR
SUCCESS IN JESUS name.

NAME: Richard Gordon
Tel: 0031630655043
Email: richardgordon20@netscape.net

Remain blessed in the name of the Lord.

Yours in Christ,

Mrs. Serena Jones

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i was smoking a cigarette at the bus stop in coply, and some woman first tells me that smoking is bad for me. i say, yeah im aware. then she tells me i should quit smoking and turn to god. jesus can save me and all the shit. i start laughing and ignoring her. she's telling me about how im going to burn in hell for all eternity and jesus can help me. i tell her to fuck off and she goes away.

that was the highlight of last week.

i get at least one of those emails
a day. it fucking pisses me off.

blame jesus.
that dick.

We were jamming last weekend and I had these three old dudes dressed in coats and ties come knocking on my door. They were trying to sell me these new bible magazines and shit, it was pretty funny. He asked me if I've read the bible so I say yeah, I've read a few of them. He says Oh so you're a church person. I say no, what I've read in the bible isn't any different than any other fairy tale I've read, plus I've researched other religions and I found that the house of satan is where I belong. These guys were freaking out, it was hilarious. As they walked down my driveway and we started playing again I could just imagine what they were thinking. That was fun! I should have had them in for a beer!

look, that's not jesus's fault there.
don't go blaming him for that one.

the_reverend said:

I know Rev, I went with the old "don't shoot the messenger" theory, he's just doing his duty to the lord or something!

it should be donated to the Reverend and his ministry here at RTTP.. We are a worthy cause.

What's wrong with Jesus?? I mean, don't get me wrong (or right I guess if you are Christian) I am not Christian, but seriously, I like Jesus. I also like Judas. I like the bible (well, I have read the first 4 or so chapters of the book of Psalms and it was quite interesting, a good story, a novel if you will). I have nothing against Jesus. He was born, worked as a carpenter, and claimed to be the sun of god. Was he? It is stupid to give a definate answer either way, because it is completely unclear whether it was true or not. People who critisize him for this claim are in reality inordinately ignorant in the fact that they have no proof either. They say, "Give me one proof that he actually was the son of god", I say "Give me one proof that he wasn't". Hell, give me one proof of either/or and I will be impressed. Also, he barely even made that religion. It was mostly the apostles. So, next time you guys feel like critisizing Christianity and all of its practicers' claims, keep in mind that you are being ignorant, and that the most witty thing to say would be to not say anything at all. And if you still decide to say shit, then say it about Peter.

That is the most philosophical thing I have ever written.

Yeah, fuck the apostles.

New Ascendancy song coming soon: "Fuck the Apostles." It'll sound like Dope's "Fuck the Police." All the meathead morons will love it.

DeOdiumMortis said:

I like the word though. "Apostle". It has a nice sound. I also like "Martyr". How come all the cool sounding words are religious words??

I'll show you my peter.

fuck god and fuck jesus


WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

george, when did you join immolation?

right after you joined hootie and the blowfish

rockin the triangle

ok, so i just got this email:

"to err is human, to forgive divine
Lose weight while you sleep
As seen on CBS,NBS The Today Show and Oprah
- Body Fat Loss..............up 82%
- Wrinkle Reduction........up 61%
- Energy Level................up 84%
- Sexual Potency............up 75%
- Memory.......................up 62%
- Muscle Strength...........up 88%
As seen on Oprah - Look Here

Daily Proverbs
fools rush in where angels fear to tread
a good man is hard to find
spare the rod and spoil the child
to the victor goes the spoils"

what do proverbs and weight loss have in common??
i'm so lost here

From: Peter I. Bunch
Date: Friday, January 09, 2004 4:25 AM
Subject: HEY fattie...lose the weight




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