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returntothepit >> discuss >> Worst night ever by Lynneaus on Dec 7,2003 10:29am
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toggletoggle post by Lynneaus  at Dec 7,2003 10:29am
ok so last night in the midst of our blizzard i hear some banging... knowing my mud room door sucks cuz my landlord never fixed it... i figure the door swung open again... sure enough my mud room is covered in snow and the door is flapping in the wind... and i see my trash barrel half way down the driveway... sooooo barefooted i just throw on some sneakers without socks and walk outside with just my flimsy ass flannel pj pants, a tshirt and sweater and the sneakers on... well my door shut and i was locked out...i say "oh shit" but knowing my landlord is home i figure its not a big deal.... i trapse thru the snow over to his side door.... i now have snow up to my knees and my sneakers are filled with snow..... i bang on his door and ring the bell but no answer (the door is downstairs hes on the second floor).... soooo i walk around to the front door and bang on that door and ring the bell... no answer.... soooo frustrated i go next door to my neighbors house (after knocking on both doors a second time)

the neighbor doest answer..... i go back in front of my house and start yelling my landlords name (now i can see the blue light from the tv) but still no response.... i see my neighbor thru the window and go back over.... a sweet older lady she is let me into her house... well u think i could remember the landlords phone number??? and of course its not listed.... soooo against my pleas of my neighbor i go back over and start throwing snowballs at my landlords windows (snowballs im making with barehands)... no answer.... my neighbor starts yellin for me to come back inside.... well i call my parents knowing at some point i gave my mom his #... and of course that # she gave me is disconnected.... my neighbor tells me to call the police so i do... apparently the only # they have is the one thats disconnected and tell me there is nothing they can do cuz they would just bang and throw snowballs too.... the lady an idiot tells me to beep my horn on my car.... ok lady no keys... no access to car... anyway the police tells me there is nothing they can do and hang up.... i went back outside and yelled some more.... banged repeatidly really loudly.... nothing...

finally i said fuck it.... found a rock.... wrapped my hand in my sweater and broke the glass on my kitchen door.... numb i came inside and had to clean glass up and cover the window with cardboard and duct tape.....

my feet were still purple and numb for like an hour.... the rest of me took like 45 mins to warm up...



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Dec 7,2003 11:03am
Lynneaus said:
sooooo barefooted i just throw on some sneakers without socks and walk outside with just my flimsy ass flannel pj pants, a tshirt and sweater and the sneakers on...


ok that sounds sexy....



on another note, what the hell happened with your landlord?
why wasn't he answering?

i hope you're not sick today

{hug}




toggletoggle post by the_reverend   at Dec 7,2003 11:08am
yeah, but did you get any?



toggletoggle post by Hoser at Dec 7,2003 11:16am
hahahahahahaha



toggletoggle post by Lynneaus  at Dec 7,2003 11:35am
well i just called my landlord... he laughed... fuckin bastard.... then he said he was sorry that he didnt hear me..... but hes gonna be down in a while to look at it and he said he would fix it.... so hopefully all i will have to pay for is a new pane of glass which shouldnt be too expensive.


and although the story started out rather porn like (i know camo flannel pj pants and a sweater and sneakers is damn sexy)... no i didnt get any.



toggletoggle post by thegreatspaldino   at Dec 7,2003 11:37am
i got some...











snow in my shoes =(



toggletoggle post by succubus  at Dec 7,2003 11:37am
ohhh you didn't say it was the camo flannel pj's!

wooooooo

i remember when you got those! i still want them too!


i'm stuck prancing in someone's boxers and a scarf
hahahaha



toggletoggle post by the_reverend   at Dec 7,2003 12:01pm
I guess someone needs to get that sex-in-the-city remote-controlled vibro-massage shower dealie that tells you reassuring things when you turn it on for xmas
so all these stories will end with "and then I got some"



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